A somatic practice worksheet

Your Embodied Yes & No

Your mind can talk you into almost anything, but your body usually knows first. This worksheet helps you learn what your own yes and no feel like, so you can trust them in bed, in love, and in every other part of your life.

By Jessica Langley · Somatic sex & relationship coach · About 10 minutes

01 · The basics

What your body is telling you

An embodied yes or no is the felt sense of a decision before you've put it into words. Many of us learned to override it to be polite, liked or easy. Learning your signals is how consent starts: with yourself.

YesOften feels like opening, warmth, softness, leaning in, or a deeper breath.

NoOften feels like tightening, bracing, pulling back, a held breath, or a drop in the belly.

Not yetFuzzy, numb or mixed. That's useful information too. It means slow down.

These are common patterns, not rules. Your signals are your own. If you feel very little at first, that's normal. Sensing gets easier with practice.

02 · Practice

Find your yes

Sit comfortably and take three slow breaths.
Bring to mind something you clearly love: a favorite food, a place, a person, a song.
Stay with it for 30 seconds. Notice what happens in your body.

Where do you feel it?

What does it feel like?

In your own words

03 · Practice

Find your no

Shake out your hands and take a breath to reset.
Bring to mind a small, everyday no: a food you dislike, a chore you dread, a noise that grates. Keep it low-stakes.
Stay with it for 30 seconds. Notice what changes.

Where do you feel it?

What does it feel like?

In your own words

04 · Your map

Your yes & no, side by side

This fills in as you tap above. Save it somewhere you'll see it.

My yes

Tap your yes sensations above.

My no

Tap your no sensations above.

Email me my map

First name Email

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Your answers go only to your inbox. I keep just your name and email.

05 · Reflect

Bring it into real life

Think of a time you said yes when your body said no. What did your body do? What makes it hard to honor your no? Who or what are you protecting? Where in your life, or your sex life, do you want more full-body yes?

06 · Daily practice

Pause, scan, name

Before you answer any request this week, big or small, take one breath and try this:

Pause. "Let me check in" is a complete sentence.
Scan. Belly, chest, throat, jaw. Opening or closing?
Name it. Yes, no, or not yet. Then decide what to say.

Go deeper

Your body has more to say

Knowing your yes and no is the first step. Saying them out loud to a partner, in the moment, while turned on or nervous, is where the real change happens. That's the work I do with clients.

Practice it in the room

Join my monthly consent & boundaries workshop. Try your yes and no with others, in a safe, playful space.

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Work with me 1 on 1

Somatic sex & relationship coaching for desire, pleasure, boundaries and connection. Start with a free discovery call.

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